In order for Saul to get to the second half of life, to get from the road to Damascus to the Way of Jesus, he had to do what Rohr calls "discharging the loyal soldier." Just as soldiers today often have difficulty leaving the military, Paul had a hard time taking off the uniform that he had been wearing and the strict rules that he had been following. And we do, too. Those of us who try to discharge our own loyal soldier find that we have to question everything we had always assumed to be true, and that can make us feel as if our whole world is collapsing around us. And we wouldn't be far from the truth. This is our first step on the "further journey," one that Rohr warns us we will experience as a setback. It will feel like a loss: a loss of faith and a loss of self. 
I listened to Richard Rohr's book, Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life while driving to and from the redwoods each week last summer. But I saved it until now because I think Rohr has an especially appropriate message for the Easter season. When you think about it, resurrection is a kind of falling upward that doesn't just happen to Jesus.... In the next several sermons I will be trying to bring the words of Richard Rohr to the words of Scripture in the hope that we can glean some wisdom for our lives. We start today with another one of Jesus' resurrection appearances in the Gospel of John.
It's in moments like this, when I look into the face of a homeless woman and see the risen Christ, that I know that the resurrection is real. Is the Christian Church dying? Always, but only dying so that it can rise again. We all have to do that. We have to die to death, so we can live for life; die to sin and brokenness, so we can live for healing and wholeness, die to hate and fear so we can live for love. In fact, that's what baptism is all about. In the ritual of baptism, we symbolically die with Christ, so that we can rise with Christ. In baptism, we let go of the old body—our old hurts, fears and failures—everything that is keeping us from rising above the old life and embracing a new one. Being baptized into the Christian life, professing a faith that is always evolving, joining a church that is always dying and rising, and letting the Spirit lead you on a journey that is always unfolding in new and unimaginable directions takes a lot of courage. If you join this church, you won't find easy answers to your questions. We will try to make it hard for you to keep your kindergarten faith, your domesticated Jesus. We want to challenge you to learn and to grow and to put Easter into action. As it says on our website, "if you want God to change your life, help us change the world." We are here to make the resurrection real. Would like to join us?
What Jesus brings into the city of Jerusalem is something very different from what we saw in the city of Chicago and what we have seen so far in this campaign. Into a city that is teeming with violence, Jesus comes as the Prince of Peace. Into a city that feeds on political power, Jesus brings spiritual power. Into an atmosphere of hate and fear, Jesus brings love and forgiveness.
When we think of how hard it is to let go of the things that make us feel significant and safe in this world, we don't want to hear that we have to give it all up in order to gain Christ. But look at the Apostle Paul and take heart. He doesn't have to renounce these things beforehand. Christ met him on the road to Damascus. He was going there with all his credentials in order to persecute Christians. Christ met him anyway. It was only after meeting Christ that Paul discovered that the things that used to make him feel good about himself could no longer do so. When Christ showed him how utterly unimportant all those things were, he didn't need them anymore. No longer relying on his own righteousness, he was saved by God's righteousness through his faith in Jesus Christ.
When we spend our time—as politicians often do—thinking that we are better, smarter, stronger, and more self-sufficient than other people, we are not likely to bother to look up and see the God who is looking down and loving us no matter how wrong or stubborn or insufferable we can sometimes be. We just have to get it in our heads that going home to God is not a weakness. Admitting that we were wrong and begging forgiveness is not a failing. Despite what the culture and the candidates teach us, being humble is not a sorry lack of self-confidence. It is a most amazing gift of grace. The only loss you incur is the loss of your false self, your proud self, and you didn't need it anyway. In losing your pride, you gain your soul.
Why does it take some of us so many years and so many tears to become who we were all along? I wonder how many of us are unhappy or unsatisfied or unfulfilled because we've been dreaming the wrong dream.... Maybe what we need is a new dream, one that is better suited to who we really are. Despite what you hear or may have been told, we were not put on this planet to live the American Dream. Besides, we are finding, as our economy becomes more globalized and our lives become entwined with people in Thailand and Bangladesh and Honduras, that our living the American Dream means that countless others will never get a chance to. As pleasant as that life may be, God is calling us to a different life, a more purposeful life.
On his way to Jerusalem, Jesus doesn't have a plan, except to fit into God's plan. "Not what I want," he says, "But what you want." [Matthew 26:39] And God's plan is far more open-ended than we might think. God doesn't have it all planned out ahead of time. When it comes to life in all of its complexities and all of it possibilities, God is far more creative and innovative than we can begin to imagine. Are you willing to take the risk of trusting that God can do something different, something new, something wonderful with you? Then I have some steps for you. Most of us don't like risk, so to give up your dis-hope will take some real discipline and patience. Dis-hope can be a bad habit. It can be an addictive pattern of thinking. Like giving up any other addiction, we have to do it one step at a time. With a tip of my hat to AA, here are my twelve steps for getting from despair to hope, from fear to trust.
In our Gospel reading this morning, the Spirit drives Jesus into the wilderness not to avoid temptation, but to meet it head on, so that he could learn to resist it and to conquer it. There were things at the very start of his ministry that he had to learn to say "no" to. So he went into the wilderness because he had to say "no" to the devil before he could fully say "yes" to God. There was no other way for him to learn but by testing. In fact, that's how we all learn.