"I am what I am." These words had a different meaning for Paul and for God. For Paul, it was an expression of honesty: "I have been an S.O.B." For God, it was "Yes, but you are also an S.O.G., a son of God. And I'm going to give you the grace to believe it and the strength to live it." That doesn't mean that grace made him perfect or changed his personality. Paul was still there, flaws and all. But grace made him able to live with himself and less prone to project his problems on to somebody else. And when he accepted the fact that he was accepted as he was, he could become what God had always known him to be. And so he tells the Corinthians, "By the grace of God, I am what I am, and his grace toward me has not been in vain."
God's love has no good reason. But Paul fell for it anyway. To a people who wanted power, he preached death on a cross. To a people who valued reason, he preached the mystery of the resurrection. No wonder Paul got himself thrown into prison! All because the world doesn't know what to do with a paradox when it stumbles on one.
The danger here is that the beauty of your words can distract us from the power of your message: out of all the good things in life, the greatest thing is love. In fact, when all is said and done, the only thing that matters is love. You said it and I believe it. But that poses a problem for me and for many other people. A lot of us would rather read the Gospels, because when we read your letters, Paul, we wonder, "Where's the love?" After all, you tell slaves not to seek their freedom [I Cor 7:21] and women to keep their heads covered and their mouths shut in church [I Cor 11:1-16; 14:34]. You also tell folk to submit to authorities because all their authority comes directly from God. [Rom 13:1-7] Is that true of Hitler? Mussolini? Idi Amin? Don't get me wrong, but love is not the first thing I think of when I read these passages.
Today, I have shown you some of the many faces of Paul: Paul the Enforcer, Paul the Mystic, Paul the Apostle, Paul the Entrepreneur; Paul the Communicator; Paul the Prisoner; and Paul the Pastor. And it is my guess that at least one of these Paul's will speak to you. Perhaps that is how best to understand how Paul can be all things to all people: by being a big enough personality to offer something to everyone. Paul is a complex character. He is a mass of contradictions. It's hard to know what to make of him. But I invite you to listen, really listen, in the next several weeks, so that we can train our ears to hear the Word of God sneaking up on and slipping through the words of Paul to speak to us. That is my hope and my prayer. Amen.